Posted in Events, Kustom 9, New Releases, We <3 RP

Confession .42. I Ask Myself What Am I Doing Here?

I hope you’ll understand that I’ll be here
Not there in the kitchen with the girl who’s always gossiping about her friends
So tell them I’ll be here…
Right next to the boy who’s throwing up cause he can’t take what’s in his cup no more
Oh God, why am I here?

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Everwinter Is fictional but Inspired By The Abandoned Amusement Park In The Real World City Of Pripyat, it is only [the artist’s] vision and not an accurate representation of pripyat or the chernobyl disaster.

Below are the actual facts about pripyat and details about the 1986 chernobyl disaster [taken from the info notecard received upon entering Everwinter].

Continue reading “Confession .42. I Ask Myself What Am I Doing Here?”

Posted in Collabor88, Events, Life, New Releases, Sad November

Confession .41. Cover Girls Don’t Cry After The Face Is Made…

But there’s a hope that’s waiting for you in the dark
You should know you’re beautiful just the way you are…
And you don’t have to change a thing
The world can change its heart…
No scars to your beautiful, we’re stars and we’re beautiful…

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I am flawed.  I am scarred.  I have not come out of life unscathed.  I am not all sunshine and rainbows, smiles and laughter.  I’m just… not.

… and that’s ok.

The people I’ve met that are all sunshine and rainbows, laughter and fairytales… those people are covering up a deeper, darker being.  Desperately keeping that side of themselves hidden from the world.  And whether that darker being is truly a bad person, or is simply a scarred version of the good-intentioned person they’d like to appear to be – I don’t know.  Mileage may vary, individual-depending, I suppose.

Continue reading “Confession .41. Cover Girls Don’t Cry After The Face Is Made…”

Posted in Events, Life, New Releases, Raffles, Sad November, We <3 RP

Confession .40. My Blood Flows Faster With Every Thought Of Everything That Happened Here…

And I remember that day that saved us…
The way you kissed me, and the salt, it filled my eyes.
And we remember our California
The night we slept along the shore and washed away…

thedaythatsavedus1final

I finally graduated.

Yes, this is another one of those posts that I guess the title could be a little ‘click-baity’ cause it has nothing to do with what I’m blogging about.  My bad.  I’ve just been watching this show on Netflix called Switched At Birth, and I’m starting from the very beginning, Season 1, that I guess started in 2011 or so?  And a lot of the songs I really like… so I’ve been on a bit of a musical binge of the ‘soundtrack’ lately, and that particular lyric stuck out to me.

But has nothing to do with this post…

Continue reading “Confession .40. My Blood Flows Faster With Every Thought Of Everything That Happened Here…”

Posted in Events, Life, New Releases, Sad November, The Gacha Garden

Confession .39. I’m Ok, I Got Me, I’m Good…

This time, keep Yours cause I got mine…
I ain’t never met nobody better
Nobody loves me like me…

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I lied.

I said I was ok with it.  With all of it.  With being stabbed in the back, with being made to believe that things were ok, with being told there were feelings there only to have them ripped away from me.  I said I was ok.  I said I should have expected it.  After all, fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice…

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Posted in Events, FaMeshed, Life, New Releases, Sad November, The Crossroads, The Gacha Garden

Confession .38. Sometimes You Gotta Burn Some Bridges Just To Create Some Distance…

You ever wonder what we could’ve been?
You said you wouldn’t and you fucking did.
Lie to me, lie with me, get your fucking fix.
Now all my drinks and all my feelings are all fucking mixed…

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“Feeling used, but I’m still missing you.  And I can’t see the end of this.  Just wanna feel your kiss against my lips.  And now all this time is passing by, but still I can’t seem to tell you why it hurts me every time I see you.  Realize how much I need you.”

She used to be strong.  She used to be… the epitome of independent, feminine strength rolled into a romantically submissive package.  The woman who could manage with the best of them but still come home and sit at Daddy’s feet and be perfectly content.

She used to be strong…

Continue reading “Confession .38. Sometimes You Gotta Burn Some Bridges Just To Create Some Distance…”

Posted in Events, Life, New Releases, The Epiphany, Tres Chic

Confession .37. I Do Dumb Shit… All The Time…

Although time may take us into different places
I will still be patient with you
And I hope you know
I won’t let go…

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This photo right here?  Taken entirely by accident.  Yay for happy accidents!

I guess that’s sort of the unofficial theme of today’s blog.  Like the title says, I do dumb shit… a lot.  And I do.  I listen to other people sometimes far more than I should, and I used to take their opinion into consideration far too often.  Now, like in an earlier blog I posted, I still believe that’s a very important thing to do professionally, because how else are you going to know when someone’s being a two-faced asshole who just wants to take advantage of you, professionally?  But when it comes to personal relationships… I used to hold far too much stock in what other people told me.

And it lead me to do some dumb shit.

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Posted in Collabor88, Events, Life, New Releases

Confession .36. Keep Out of Trouble And You Double Your Choices…

Hey yo, I’m just like my country
I’m young, scrappy, and hungry
And I’m not throwing away my shot…

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So.  If you’re not new to the blogger world, then you know that Blueberry’s blogger applications are open until the 13th, and then they close.  This will be the first time in a year that they’ve opened, and let me tell you… Blueberry is at the top of my blogger bucket list – and not just because my list is in alphabetical order.

Continue reading “Confession .36. Keep Out of Trouble And You Double Your Choices…”