Confession .97. Every Day You’re Here, I’m Healing…

I’ve been hearing symphonies
Before all I heard was silence
A rhapsody for You and me
And every melody is timeless…

Core Values.

This was the topic of a discussion I attended this afternoon, and it definitely made me think.  Granted, I have been at a point where previous relationships have caused me to examine those things I consider to be Core Values… but this discussion made me think about some of this stuff in a different way…

Confession .96. I Wanna Be Like Most Girls…

Most girls are smart and strong and beautiful
Most girls word hard, go far, we are unstoppable
Most girls, our fight to make every day
No two are the same
I wanna be like, I wanna be like most girls…

“You know, some days you feel so good in your own skin, but it’s ok if you wanna change the body that you came in.  Cause you look greatest when you feel like a damn queen!  We’re all just playing a game, in a way, tryna win that life.”

I love this song.  Like… love it.  Lately, the songs I’ve been blogging, I’ve heard on the radio (I know, right?  That still exists?!) in the car on my way home from work.  The station I listen to prides itself on playing what ‘YOU want to hear’, so every day at 5pm local time, they do a “Test Drive At 5” with a new song, then they ask on Twitter for thumbs up and thumbs down.

I think this song was, like, 81% positive feedback.

Confession .95. I Have Questions For You…

My, my name was safest in your mouth
And why’d you have to go and spit it out?
Oh, your voice was the most familiar sound
But it sounds so dangerous to me now…

Do you care?  Do you care?  Why don’t you care?  I gave you all of me: my blood, my sweat, my heart… and my tears.  Why don’t you care?  Why don’t you care?

I was there!  I was there when no one was.  Now you’re gone, and I’m here.

I have questions for you…

Confession .94. Who Cares If One More Light Goes Out? I Do…

The reminders pull the floor from your feet
In the kitchen, one more chair than you need
And you’re angry… and you should be… it’s not fair
Just cause you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it isn’t there…

I was more than a little bit terrified when I started getting wind of a new Linkin Park album.

Like… I grew up with Linkin Park… and they were kind of the misfit’s anthem of my generation – at least in the part of the midwest I was in… maybe in more musically-diverse areas of the country and of the world, you had a different band that was this for you… but, like… I couldn’t wrap my head around being now 27 years old and going back to listening to this band from my childhood/early-adolescence.

And then I heard “Heavy” for the first time.  And that song played on repeat for DAYS… Linkin Park had managed to write my anthem all over again… so of course, I started poking around at other songs from the album.

That’s when I found this one…

Confession .93. If I Showed You, Would You Run Away?

Do I even need you?  Should I leave you?
Do I gotta be you just to please you?
Do I say I’m all good when I bleed you through my heart?
Quit tearing mine apart…

I think people sometimes forget how relevant music can be if you take a moment to listen to the lyrics.  They’re not just fancy words written just because they rhyme.  Someone wrote them for a reason.  They speak someone’s heart… they tell someone’s story.

To demonstrate this, the rest of this post is going to be the lyrics of this blogging tune, but written out in ‘paragraph’ form, rather than line by line.

Music is someone’s life.  And sometimes, it can be so closely related to our own, that some of use better communicate via music than we do our own words.

Try to keep this in mind when dealing with people.

Confession .92. I’m Holding On To So Much More Than I Can Carry…

I keep dragging around what’s bringing me down
If I’d just let go, I’d be set free…

May 14th, 2017.  Mother’s Day here in the US.  Normally I don’t think much about it, aside from celebrating it with my own mother.  Though she and I are incredibly close… so it’s not like “This is the one day a year I hang out with my mom.”  Not quite.  We’re together a lot.

So today was mostly just another day, aside from my taking her to lunch in an INCREDIBLY crowded place that she chose.  Heh.

But for me… it was what I’ve been seeing on Facebook the past couple of days… that has sparked this particular post.

Confession .91. If My Armor Breaks, I’ll Fuse It Back Together…

If I fall, get knocked down
Pick myself up off the ground…

So this?  This right here?  This is my ride or die.  😀

Which is why it’s so strange to me that I’m pretty sure this is the first time we’ve truly collaborated.  But, to be fair, that’s likely my fault.  Cause I’ve always been relatively terrible at pictures that involve more than one person… so I’ve always been wary about pulling someone else into my little slice of the world over here, and then not being able to make them look as amazing as they deserve.

At least Nova wouldn’t kill me if this turned out shitty.  LOL.

Confession .90. Density. Mass per unit volume…

And now your song is on repeat
And I’m dancin’ on to your heartbeat
And when you’re gone, I feel incomplete
So if you want the truth…
I just want to be part of your symphony…

“Now I can’t find the key without you.”

I’m having a mini identity crisis… so please forgive the sad nature of this post and the ‘woe is me’ moment that I’m about to have.  You’ve been warned.  I simply didn’t realize how big this regret was in my life until recently, and I kinda need to get it off my chest.

Welcome, sounding board.  I love you for being here.

Confession .89. I’ve Heard It All Before At Least A Million Times…

I’m so sick of that same old love
That shit, it tears me up…
I’m so sick of that same old love
My body’s had enough…

This is another one of those posts that might not make much sense to anyone other than for Whom it is intended.  My apologies for this.

I was going through my notecards folder Saturday morning based on an off-handed comment in a discussion… and I found my petition.  It’s about a week shy of being one year ago.  So that’s what’s been on my mind lately.

Confession .88. My Life, My Love, My Drive, It Came From… Pain!

I was choking in the crowd, building my rain up in the cloud
Falling like ashes to the ground
Hoping my feelings, they would drown
But they never did, ever lived, ebbing and flowing
Inhibited, Limited… til it broke open and rained down
It rained down like…

I’ve bitten my tongue far too hard for far too long.  And tonight, I attempted to warn someone who was in a position to DO something about this particular individual, in terms of giving them access to a hunting ground of people to prey upon… and they did nothing.

So instead… here is my letter to the Predator’s current flavor of the week… and any who may come after her…