I got a song filled with shit for the strong-willed
When the world gives you a raw deal
Sets you off ’til you scream, “Piss off! Screw you!”
When it talks to you like you don’t belong
Or tells you you’re in the wrong field
When something’s in your mitochondrial
‘Cause it latched on to you…
Here’s your advanced warning that i’m also blogging this tune tomorrow. It’s been stuck in my head for days now, and i did today’s photo with it in mind, however, i’ve also got something in the works with some Sweet Thing awesomeness that makes me think of this song too… so… you get it twice in a row. Sorry, not sorry.
Continue reading “Confession .226. Venom, I Got That Adrenaline Momentum…”
P/people wanna talk while i’m not around to hear
Really, T/they don’t know what i’m made of
P/people keep on walkin’ so far away from here
Clearly, i’m the one T/they’re afraid of…
4 days into NaNoWriMo and i’m already behind… i didn’t intend to blog the progress, so don’t get all weird about seeing writing from me all throughout November… lol… but i DID intend to spend November writing.
Though i don’t write novels. i did mean to focus a bit on some poetry, though.
Continue reading “Confession .224. So What If I’m The Monster That’s Been Here All Along…”
Is A/anybody out there?
Can Y/you take this weight of mine?
Is A/anybody out there?
Can Y/you lead me to the light?
i don’t like talking much about my dad. i’ve told the story in here of how he died/how i found out about it… and i’ve told a few stories about him generally – especially when it comes to ways i’m like he was… but otherwise, i don’t really like to talk about him. Tbh, it’s still really hard… 5 years later, things like his birthday still make it feel like it was yesterday.
Continue reading “Confession .223. You Are Not Alone; I’ve Been Here The Whole Time…”
Don’t You know i’m no good for You?
i’ve learned to lose, You can’t afford to…
Tore my shirt to stop You bleeding
But nothing ever stops You leaving…
i don’t have the energy to sustain one-sided friendships, relationships, or anything-ships really. i spent too much of my life doing this because i had myself convinced that if i just worked a little bit harder to prove that i was good enough, i could have something great with this person. A great friend. A great lover. A great Dominant. A great whatever. But unfortunately i constantly learn the hard way that no matter how hard you work – with some people, you’re never going to get anything back.
That doesn’t stop me from regularly making a dumbass out of myself, however.
Continue reading “Confession .222. I Could Lie And Say I Like It Like That…”
i still see Your shadows in my room
Can’t take back the love that i gave You
It’s to the point where i love and i hate You
And i cannot change You so i must replace You…
i hadn’t written anything new, poetry-wise, since the Beyond the Rainbow event i read at during BOI Week… i’d started a few things but nothing that i never really finished until last night when i was journaling. So this is another blog post where i’m going to cheat and show you what i journaled. Some of you, while not D/s, may still relate to this… and D/s people, particularly submissives, may relate more deeply.
Continue reading “Confession .221. Who Knew Evil Girls Had The Prettiest Face?”
So pull me up from down below
Cause i’m underneath the undertow
Come dry me off and hold me close
i need You now, i need You most
So… Avril Lavigne released new music. That was a thing that happened in the last couple of weeks. After HOW many years? Right, let’s all revel in that for a moment… especially since this song is… amazing.
W/we’re not going to mention how much i relate to these lyrics right now… nope… nope…
Continue reading “Confession .220. I Can’t Swim The Ocean Like This Forever, And I Can’t Breathe…”
Even though all of my fears
And all of my doubts
Are outside my door, ready for war
Right here and now…
As a part of my training in the D/s sim i consider my home Community, i’ve been picking up journaling again. In the past, i didn’t find it effective – which is probably ironic, given that i’ve been writing here in this blog for five years with each post, so clearly there’s something to be said for the therapeutic quality of stream-of-consciousness type writing – but with the way it’s been panning out for the last couple of weeks, it’s been helpful, giving me a place to just… be… and write down my thoughts, unfiltered.
i want to share with Y/you all today a portion of my journal entry from yesterday… Some of you might be able to guess what sparked this particular line of thought – though i’m not going to mention it or talk about it specifically here. It simply served as inspiration, and the last thing i want to do is come across as ‘salty’ or ‘bitter’ about it. ♥
Continue reading “Confession .219. And They’re Marching In…”