Posted in Collabor88, Events, Life, New Releases

Confession .328. Look At You All Dressed Up For Someone You Never See…

And i wonder why i tear myself down
To be built back up again
Oh i hope somehow, i’ll wake up young again…

Confession .328.  Look At You All Dressed Up For Someone You Never See...

Yesterday was my rez day, so forgive my extra. -grins-

Continue reading “Confession .328. Look At You All Dressed Up For Someone You Never See…”

Posted in Events, Life, New Releases, Uber

Confession .302. It’s Evolving, Just Backwards…

Confession .302.  It's Evolving, Just Backwards...

i took this title from the title of a Pewdiepie video.  i didn’t actually watch the video, so i’m not sure of the context, but the title just seemed to speak to everything that was on my heart right now.  Consider this a disclaimer.  i suppose i should also add a trigger warning… but i’m not sure what for?  If you don’t like being reminded of your privilege, i guess?

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Posted in Equal10, Events, FaMeshed, Life, New Releases

Confession .300. If I Played Along To Ease The Friction, Would You Still Tell Me That I’m Terrible?

Is this what you came for, you paid for?
To watch somebody burn and crumble and stumble
Then fumble all my words and let you twist them
And listen to all the ugly things you tell me i am
i’m tryin’ so hard to understand how i’m the
Master Manipulator who couldn’t fool anyone
Monster Reciprocator, shot no bullets from my gun
The Drama Queen who never seems to get applause from anyone
i won’t be who you say i am…

Confession .300.  If I Played Along To Ease The Friction, Would You Still Tell Me That I'm Terrible?

Of course i’m returning with a Gabbie Hanna song – it’d feel inappropriate if i didn’t.  Lol.  Her new EP, Bad Karma came out on the day my blogging ‘vacation’ ended, and given that the first time i heard the song “Special”, i immediately sat down, choreographed a whole routine and built a set to perform it next Sunday at Moonshadow, this felt like the appropriate song to return to.

So i’m back… kinda.

Continue reading “Confession .300. If I Played Along To Ease The Friction, Would You Still Tell Me That I’m Terrible?”

Posted in Collabor88, Events, Life, New Releases

Confession .274. The Aftermath Of One Too Many Words I Said When I Should’ve Said Nothing At All…

Yeah, these thoughts i would never speak out loud
i’ve seen you cry but i’ve never seen you shout like a hurricane
These shots don’t ricochet
Sight blurred, i’m walking dazed, girl
i’m fucking faded
Or maybe wasted, i can’t remember how it happened
Oh, i don’t know my limits at all…
i’m sinking down into my thoughts…

Confession .274.  The Aftermath Of One Too Many Words I Said When I Should've Said Nothing At All...

P/people assume that when you pull back, it’s because of something wrong with you.  Not always.  Not everything is the fault of E/everyone else in the world.  Sometimes, if someone withdraws from you, you are the problem.  You aren’t safe for their Universe.  Your gravitational pull is too much for their orbit.  You aren’t safe for my Universe.  Your gravitational pull is too much for my orbit.

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Posted in Dark Style Fair, Events, Life, New Releases

Confession .273. It’s Funny How The Warning Signs Can Feel Like They’re Butterflies…

It’s crazy when the thing you love the most is the detriment
Let that sink in…
You can think again
When the hand you wanna hold is a weapon and you’re nothing but skin…

Confession .273.  It's Funny How The Warning Signs Can Feel Like They're Butterflies...

i can’t anymore.  i just can’t.  The only reason i continue to is because i promised i wouldn’t just kinda… word-vomit it everywhere.  But why do people get to hurt and manipulate other people and still get exactly what they want?  Like… why is that ok?

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Posted in Events, Hell's Gate, Uber

Confession .272. And If You Switch Sides, You’re Gonna Have To Claim Your Place…

Probably cause you’re the one playin’ the mind games…
You hate me because i don’t let you play no mind games
They give me migraines and damage my brain…

Confession .272.  And If You Switch Sides, You're Gonna Have To Claim Your Place...

Funny thing about half-truths… they always come out eventually.  Whether it’s half-truths Y/you’re telling a romantic partner/potential romantic partner, or half-truths Y/you’re telling Y/your F/friends and A/acquaintances… they will always catch up to Y/you, because eventually Y/you’ll forget which lies Y/you told to cover up the last one, to cover up the one before that, to cover up the first one.  It will all just get too much, and Y/you’ll slip.  It always happens.  It’s why i don’t understand why P/people even bother to begin that nightmare chain in the first place.

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Posted in Events, Hell's Gate, Life, New Releases, Salem, Uber

Confession .271. Is It Too Soon To Know If It’s Too Soon To Say For Now?

Paint a picture in my brain, encapsulate the fleeting feeling
It ricochets, replace my pain ’til every trace is leaving
The nerve of autumn time days flying by, every sunrise healing me
And W/we’re okay, W/we’ll live this way ’til it’s done…

Confession .271.  Is It Too Soon To Know If It's Too Soon To Say For Now?

Been a minute, hasn’t it? If Y/you missed the craziness on Facebook… i, uh… broke my ankle in RL.  Yes, it was a stupid situation.  Yes, i’m clumsy and a klutz.  W/we can move on now.  Lol.  W/we’re beginning one of my favorite times of year… October.

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Posted in Collabor88, Events, Saturday Sale, The Arcade

Confession .270. In Case You Don’t Live Forever, Let Me Tell You The Truth…

i’ve carried this song in my mind
Listen, it’s echoing in me
But i haven’t helped You to hear it…
We, we’ve only got so much time
i’m pretty sure it would kill me
If You didn’t know the pieces of me are pieces of You…

Confession .270.  In Case You Don't Live Forever, Let Me Tell You The Truth...

This is one of those existential crisis type posts.  So if you’re not down to listen to somewhat angry, somewhat frantic rambling, then scroll to the bottom for Y/your credits and i’ll see Y/you next time.  Lol.  To the rest of Y/you: Hello.  And i’m sorry in advance.

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Posted in Life, New Releases

Confession .267. Everything Is Temporary, Everything Will Slide…

Seasons, they will change, Life will make You grow
Death can make You hard, hard, hard
Everything is temporary, everything will slide
Love will never die, die, die…

Confession .267.  Everything Is Temporary, Everything Will Slide...

i try not to blog on this day each year.  August 1st is hard for me, but given that it’s 11:47pm, at night, about to become August 2nd, i think i can still get away with it before i go to sleep.

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Posted in Events, Life, N21, New Releases

Confession .265. You Don’t Know What It’s Like…

So let me just give up, let me just let go
If this isn’t good for me, well, i don’t wanna know
Let me just stop trying, let me just stop fighting
i don’t need Your good advice or reasons why i’m alright
You don’t know what it’s like…

Confession .265.  You Don't Know What It's Like...

Hopelessness is a feeling with unfathomable depth.  Each time Y/you think Y/you’ve hit rock bottom with it, S/someone or something else can push Y/you just a little bit deeper.  Let Y/you sink just a little bit further down… and at some point i worry that i won’t have enough oxygen left to swim to the surface.  It’s a dangerous game of chicken to play, and eventually, S/someone’s going to lose.

Continue reading “Confession .265. You Don’t Know What It’s Like…”