When I was a little girl, my mama said to me
“What’s your favorite flower, darling? I’ll get you the seed”
I said “Dandelion, Dandelion, ” that one’s so pretty
She said, “Child, that one’s not a flower, that one’s just a weed”
Oh, what a same. Now it don’t look the same. Guess it don’t look the same. Oh, what a shame.
Continue reading “Confession .301. So I Took A Breath And Made A Wish And Blew Them All Away…”
i’m a wanderer
i weave my way by dancing
In hopes that the cool kids will ask me to stay
i’m invisible to bright lights
Just standing on the side line waiting for a standing ovation
That i know just isn’t mine…
It’s been a long time since i’ve done one of these… but it feels like it’s needed right now…
Continue reading “Confession .294. It’s A Terrible Feeling Being The Ghost On The Wall That’s Always Disappearing…”
Cause i used to defy gravity, defy gravity
Goodbyes keep dragging me down…
And i’m fighting gravity, defying gravity
i’ve tried but i keep falling, cause falling’s easy
But it only brings You down…
Today is the last day of ROMP! And while Y/you haven’t seen too terribly much from me over these last 2 posts, Y/you have gotten to see some of my absolute favorites from this round. When items are quality, it makes doing what i do so much easier and allows me to simply have fun and play around in Photoshop for enjoyment rather than obligation, so i’m grateful to have been part of the team for this round.
Continue reading “Confession .276. And It Means Nothing Til You Let It…”
You like broken girls cause they make You feel put together
Broken girls, rip it open then You kiss it better…
It’s been awhile. Damn near a month. And i apologize for that. If Y/you read my last post, Y/you know that i posted that literally the day after i got home from the hospital. i wasn’t ready to share all of that with E/everyone, really, but unfortunately, a poorly-managed situation in my home Community in which my personal business was being spread around carelessly made it such that if i didn’t tell the rest of my own story it likely would’ve morphed beyond recognition by the time i was ready to speak about it.
Unfortunately, that means that i kinda had to force myself to be more raw than i was ready to be, and it took away every desire i had to write anything else for awhile. Again, my apologies. Especially to those Designers who entrust me with showcasing their designs. i’m playing catch up, and i thank you in advance for Y/your understanding. ♥
Continue reading “Confession .275. Dig Up All The Ugly Shit, Then You Offer Up Your Remedy…”
Nothing that you say is mildly true
Spit deceit through shift smiles
Two faces you’ve had for awhile
You act like such a fucking child…
Today, I’d like to have a fun little chat about gaslighting – so please consider this your trigger warning for subjects like self-harm, psychological/mental abuse, and other similar themes. If you click off for this reason, then see you next time! ♥
Continue reading “Confession .207. Turns Out I’m Your Favorite Thing To Discuss…”
So won’t You ride with me, ride with me
See where this thing goes…
If it’s meant to be, it’ll be, it’ll be
Baby, if it’s meant to be…
It’s been… several days. And the reasoning for which I wish wasn’t the reason. Was that vague enough?
Continue reading “Confession .188. Hold Up, Girl, Don’t You Know You’re Beautiful?”
He said, “Be true”
I swear, “I’ll try”
In the end, it’s Him and I…
“Maybe it won’t work out. But maybe seeing if it does will be the best adventure ever.”
So… things happened. Hear me out.
Continue reading “Confession .169. In The End, It’s Him And I…”
Cause I had the best of the worst sides
And I had these lungs
And I had too many flash fires that I just let them burn
Til my chest is on fire
And my head just won’t die
I guess I’m lyin’ cause I wanna
I guess I’m lyin’ cause I don’t
Cause I just feel so tired…
“Like it’s move or slowly die…”
Again, sorry not sorry that Eden songs have been stuck in my head for the last several days. It’s one of those times when I re-discover how much I love something. Especially when I spent more hours than I’d like to count tabbed into the Hunt avatar managing everything over there, I just toss on a mix that’s an hour or two long so I don’t have to worry about finding new songs to listen to. And one of my favorite mixes is full of Eden and The Eden Project songs. Lol.
So can you really blame me?
Continue reading “Confession .154. Cause I’m A Fucking Mess Sometimes…”
And You say I drink and I smoke and I talk too much
But I know You lied when You said that You just had enough and save Yourself
So hear me out…
“And You said need me to let this go, but it’s who I am. Or am I just losing it? Cause You said ‘Jump’ and I went first, but falling’s always been my downfall.”
This song. Ugh. It just punches me right in the feels. So… I’m sorry if it punches you in the feels too. *Nods lots* Then again, most things that Eden and The Eden Project does know exactly how to drag you through a rollercoaster of emotions that you didn’t know you were going to feel for those 3 to 5 minutes.
It’s fucking tragically beautiful.
Continue reading “Confession .153. And It Mean Nothing Til You Let It…”
And I know that I’m still fucked up
But aren’t we all, my love?
Darling, our scars make us who we are
So when the winds are howling strong
And you think you can’t go one
Hold tight, sweetheart…
I’ve talked about this a few times before, once extensively that I can remember… unless I’m just implanting memories in my own head, which is entirely possible as I’ve not had much sleep today… but it’s time to go over it again.
Progressive Myoclonous Epilepsy with Early Dementia. Or, FENIB. (Which means something else entirely that I don’t know.)
My family’s disease.
Continue reading “Confession .118. What’s Left Of My Heart’s Still Made of Gold…”