Confession .181. I’m So Defeated, I Can’t Get Outside My Head…

I post a picture of myself, cause I’m lonely
Everyone knows what I look like, not even one of them knows me
Yeah, I just want to drink tequila with my friends
I’m so defeated, I just want this shit to end…

My muse is extra flighty lately.  Pardon me while I beat her back into submission…

Also, I’m incredibly unsure how I managed to get the environment to look peaceful and pretty while I have a knife in my hand.  I’ve just learned not to question what happens when I’m tinkering around in Photoshop.

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Confession .180. Sometimes I Feel Like Giving Up, But I Just Can’t…

Help me, it’s like the walls are caving in
Sometimes I feel like giving up
No medicine is strong enough
Someone help me
I’m crawling in my skin…
Sometimes I feel like giving up, but I just can’t
It isn’t in my blood…

I did a bit more editing to this photo than I usually do, when it came to drawing in details that I couldn’t capture sufficiently in SL.  I felt a bit like I was back in my days of having a shitty graphics card, where I would have to draw all my shadows and any details that I wanted.  However, in this case, I was prioritizing what the light on the avatar looked like, versus the sky and water detailing, so I added all that in afterwards.

And this hair, though!

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Confession .175. These Hands Could Hold The World, But It’ll Never Be Enough…

All the shine of a thousand spotlights
All the stars that we steal from the night sky
Will never be enough
Never be enough…

“I’m trying to hold my breath… let it stay this way… can’t let this moment end…”

I’m struggling.  And the only thing I know to do when I’m struggling is to write about it… so you’re getting a bit of a glimpse into my head and my heart at the moment.  If you don’t want that, then feel free to scroll to the end for credits and I’ll see you next time.  ♥

To the rest of you, hi…

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Confession .164. What Everyone Wondered, We Never Questioned…

We were crazy, tragic and epic, and so amazing
I’ll always wear the crown that You gave me
We will always stay lost in forever
And they’ll remember
We were legends…

Ohai.  I figured it was time to blog this dress/sweater situation, because I’ve always gravitated back into it since it came out.  I’m a sucker for a good cropped sweater, though… and the fit of any Blueberry dress is to DIE for… so here you go.  If you somehow live under a rock and didn’t know this release was a thing… scroll down.

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Confession .161. No One Can Walk Away Truly Alive…

Are You the cure or disease
Do You still take as You please?
Are You the cure or are You the disease?

So… I took and edited these pictures yesterday… and then got distracted, so I never did the post.  Oops.

Also, Merry Belated Christmas and Happy Belated New Year, since I haven’t blogged since both of those holidays have passed.  I kinda got caught up in the holidays around in RL, the end of the POE 10 hunt in SL, and then my muse just… took a vacation.  Like, I couldn’t look at things in my inventory – bought or otherwise – and figure out something I wanted to put together.

I spent weeks in the same outfit, and I was lucky if I even changed colors.  LOL.  That was the point I was at before yesterday.

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Confession .159. But If You Keep Second Guessing Then There’s Only Gonna Be One End…

So I’ve been thinking that I think too much
And I can’t sleep, but I can dream of us
And I’ve been seeing shit like horror cuts
It’s burning down… I gotta drown this out…
And You said You need me to let this go
But it’s who I am, or am I just losing it?
Cause You said ‘jump’ and I went first, but falling’s always been my downfall…

I don’t really know what to say in this post… which is ironic because I’ve been offline for almost a week, so there should be lots to say, right?  Like, I’m behind…

But I dunno… I just got home from a mini vacation to Mississippi this weekend, so maybe there are some stories to talk about there.

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