Confession .71. She’s The Last True Mouthpiece

No Masters or Kings
When the Ritual begins
There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin…

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So, I found this cover today.  Ellie Goulding’s voice and this song?  *Swoons*

Anyway… sorry… where was I?  Oh yeah!  Cute things and black-and-white goodness!

I mentioned in my last post that Astralia was one of my newest sponsors.  In my small hiatus, I gained a few amazing sponsors that have trusted their creations to me, and I couldn’t be more grateful.  In this post, I’ll be introducing a few more of those to you: Kenny Rolands, Glamistry, and Facade.

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Confession .61. Wytai

I wanted everything I never had
Like the love that comes with light
I wore envy, and I hated that
But I survived…

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wytai

n. a feature of modern society that suddenly strikes you as absurd and grotesque—from zoos and milk-drinking to organ transplants, life insurance, and fiction—part of the faint background noise of absurdity that reverberates from the moment our ancestors first crawled out of the slime but could not for the life of them remember what they got up to do.

I have my fair share of things about the world like this… things that for whatever reason that I don’t like – some for my own reasons that no one else understands, and some for reasons that even I don’t understand or can’t find.  But one thing I think most of us can agree on… Bad things happening to good people.

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Confession .60. The Meantime

Touch me and then turn away
And put your hands into the flame
Tell me if you feel this pain
Cause I don’t want to be a ball and chain, no…

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the meantime

n. the moment of realization that your quintessential future self isn’t ever going to show up, which forces the role to fall upon the understudy, the gawky kid for whom nothing is easy, who spent years mouthing their lines in the wings before being shoved into the glare of your life, which is already well into its second act.

Have you ever had one of those moments where shows like Big Bang Theory make you wonder if, at any moment in your life, your future self will randomly show up in your living room because time travel has been invented in the future and you’re about to make a really stupid mistake?

Granted, I’m not sure what kind of mistake you’d be making in your living room alone on a Saturday night… but bear with me.

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Confession .58. Would You Fall In The Name Of Love?

If I told You this was only gonna hurt
If I warned You that the fire’s gonna burn
Would You walk in?  Would You let me do it first?
Do it all in the name of love…

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So, in typical Tivi fashion… I am only useful to a friend of mine months after she needs it.  *Laughs*

I’m going to tell you the story of how I met Master… because it kinda makes me giggle… and because as we go into 2017, rather than focusing on all of the shit that’s happened in 2016, I’d like to focus a bit on what made the end of my 2016 bearable.

And that’s two particular people in my life: Master, and Nova.

Some time ago, Nova was writing an article for an SL publication that I won’t name… cause I don’t feel like advertising them.  *Laughs*  Those of you that are Facebook friends with us both might know the mag I’m talking about, because Nova put out on her Facebook looking for success stories from people who had met their significant others on AvMatch.  Yes, AvMatch is exactly what it sounds like… the eHarmony/Match.Com of Second Life.

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Confession .57. I Will Follow You…

Into the fire, out of the smoke
Walking the wire to find our way home
We are not holy, we are not whole
But there are tiny cracks of light between our bones…

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** Warning: This is another instance in which I’m writing this on Thursday and you’re reading it on Friday (likely)… so when I say ‘today’, I mean Thursday.  Lol. **

My step-dad’s CT-guided biopsy was today.  I was/still am skeptical about it because they originally told us if they needed more tissue, the only way to do it was laproscopically.  Then, magically, they needed more tissue, but they were going to try this method.  Less invasive, yes, but also… if they didn’t get enough/a good enough piece this time?  Then we’ve put him through this only to make him get MORE taken out laproscopically anyway and waste MORE time that he could be having treatment.

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Confession .55. One Hand Is Holding Yours While The Other Is Waving Goodbye…

I’m with the enemy in my bed
When the voice in my head
Tells me I should treat myself better…

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Well I took a couple days off for Christmas with my family.  But I didn’t want to put too much of a hitch in the momentum I’ve created lately with daily posting.  I can’t guarantee it’s always going to be like this… but while I’m inspired, I’m sure gonna try!

Uber opened ON Christmas Day… so I’m sure you can imagine my anticipation of getting home from time with my family and staying awake long enough to try and poke around at some of my favorites.  One thing I knew I was going for, immediately?  This bodysuit and skirt.

Dammit, Annie.  Lol.

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Confession .53. I Told Myself This Could Be Rough…

So I’ll get the lights, and You lock the doors
We ain’t leaving this room til we both feel more
Don’t walk away, don’t roll Your eyes
They say love is pain.
Well, darling, let’s hurt tonight…

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This isn’t exactly the most festive of outfits.  My apologies for that.  I did get the gorgeous bracelets/armlets/rings featured above in a blogger pack from Promagic, so I wanted something I could pair with them.  However, I’m just not exactly in the most festive mood today.

For the better part of several months now, I’ve been on this emotional rollercoaster with my RL family.  My step-dad has been in pain.  He has a bad back… so at first we thought nothing of it.  But then it didn’t go away.  He started getting sick… and his symptoms manifested like gallbladder symptoms, so we still didn’t worry too much.  He just needs a HIDA scan and to probably schedule gallbladder surgery.  No biggie.  We’ve had a surgeon down here do mine… but then all the tests started coming back negative and normal.  Then the doctor refused to run more tests and just wanted to ‘wait until his regular six month check-up’.  Meanwhile my step-dad was still in unmanaged pain.  So clearly this wasn’t acceptable.  He was taken to the ER, and was sent home with information about Pancreatic Cancer.  My mother fell apart.  His daughters fell apart.  His sisters fell apart.  He was sent to see a GI Specialist who ordered a biopsy, and it came back negative… no cancer.  But he didn’t trust it.  So he ordered another one, and sent my step-dad to see a Pancreatic specialist.  That specialist read the biopsy the same way… no cancer.  But there’s an autoimmune disease that mimicks Pancreatic Cancer symptoms.  Said he would run those tests.  Those came back negative.  Instead, they found Lymphoma.  Sent my step-dad to an Oncologist.  Oncologist says the sample isn’t good enough for him to confirm the diagnosis, or tell us what type of Lymphoma, or stage it.  Needs a PET scan and to consult with the Tumor Board.  PET scan comes back negative, thank god.  So the cancer (if it’s cancer) has not spread.  Oncologist warns that if the Tumor Board needs more tissue, the only way is to get it laproscopically.  Promised he would call Thursday after the meeting.

The doctor called this afternoon.  (You’re seeing this Friday, but I’m writing it Thursday.)

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