Confession .154. Cause I’m A Fucking Mess Sometimes…

Cause I had the best of the worst sides
And I had these lungs
And I had too many flash fires that I just let them burn
Til my chest is on fire
And my head just won’t die
I guess I’m lyin’ cause I wanna
I guess I’m lyin’ cause I don’t
Cause I just feel so tired…

“Like it’s move or slowly die…”

Again, sorry not sorry that Eden songs have been stuck in my head for the last several days.  It’s one of those times when I re-discover how much I love something.  Especially when I spent more hours than I’d like to count tabbed into the Hunt avatar managing everything over there, I just toss on a mix that’s an hour or two long so I don’t have to worry about finding new songs to listen to.  And one of my favorite mixes is full of Eden and The Eden Project songs.  Lol.

So can you really blame me?

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Confession .152. One Of The Only Girls That I Love, Dat My Main…

So all you haters lookin’, you could try tonight
Cause I’m down for whatever when she’s by my side
Dat my main one, dat my main one
And we’ll always be down for life…

“Ladies, do we sell water in this bar?”
“Hellllllllllllll nah!”

This song has been on repeat since Saturday night… so of course it showed up on this post.  Though it would’ve been better in a post WITH my main one.  Haha.  But that’s kinda what this post is about…

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Confession .151. I’d Be All You Need, And You’d Get Drunk On Me…

Maybe if I was a neon light
I’d lead your car right back to my door
Oh, maybe if I was a jukebox needle dropping on a drinking song
You’d want one more
If my name was Whiskey
Maybe right now you’d miss me…

There comes a time where you’ve given so much to someone or something, that you have to see if it’s not being reciprocated.  You have to sit back and objectively look at what you’re giving and what you’re getting back from it and question whether the return is worth the effort put in.

And sometimes it will be unbalanced, and that’ll still be ok.  Other times, it will take sitting back and looking objectively at it to see just how much your efforts are being taken advantage of.

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Confession .149. Chasing Dreams Like I’m On Novacaine…

Stay, You’re not gonna leave me
This place is right where You need to be
And why Your words gotta mean so much to them
And they mean nothing to me
So stay, You’re not what you’re hearing
Cause I’ve been watching You changing
And who said You’re one in a million anyway?

Don’t judge me.  Girl-Tivi is less of the barefoot hippie I used to be… so boy-Tivi has to take over that role now.  Lol.

Also, not to spoil the content of the post too much, but consider this your trigger warning.  If death, near-death experiences, or cancer are triggers for you, then you may want to proceed into this post with caution.

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Confession .137. You Think I Can’t Get Hood Like You, You Motherfucker?

I can do it like a brother
Do it like a dude
Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you…

So… this is a thing that happened.  *Itches nervously at the back of her neck*

Honestly?  I’ve been meaning to do the m-alt thing for awhile, and I’m too lazy to build up another avatar with poses and stuff, so I figured I may as well do it on Tivi and just have my own shape/head/body situation over here, so that I have access to all my poses and other stuff.

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Confession .133. You’re The Last Of A Dying Breed…

You were too good to be true
But what’s inside you, but what’s inside you…

Today I want to have a chat about Maxwell Graf.  You may or may not have heard that name before.  He’s the creator behind the store Rustica.  Maybe that rings a bell for you now?  But even if it doesn’t, I urge you to continue reading.

Max is in need of our help… and here’s how some of the most brilliant minds in Second Life are joining together to provide some aid.

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Confession .132. Too Hard To Breathe, I’m On My Knees Right Now…

I’m so sick of that same old love
That shit, it tears me up
I’m so sick of that same old love
My body’s had enough…

For a long time, both in my SL and my RL I’ve tried to figure out this delicate balance between how I feel as a submissive, and how I feel as a ‘hopeless romantic’ in a more vanilla sense.  And let me tell you, it’s not exactly the easiest balance to find.

Today, you’re going to get some ramblings from my brain about romanticism and M/s relationships.

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