Confession .345. How Am I Gonna Be An Optimist About This?

And the walls kept tumbling down
In the city that we love
Grey clouds roll over the hills
Bringing darkness from above…

If You close Your eyes, does it almost feel like nothing changed at all?

Confession .344. We Danced With Monsters Through The Night…

I’m never gonna look back
Woah, never gonna give it up
No, just don’t wake me now…

Her mother always said that she ran away and joined the circus, and in a way perhaps that’s what she’d done. In reality, though, she’d simply needed to find herself. And in doing so, not to sound too much like a repeat of Chicago, but she found…

Confession .343. But You Won’t Be Left Behind…

So I’ll tell You now, I don’t have a doubt
I’ll come home to You, no matter what we do
I will find a way, cause I’m not ready
To say goodbye at anytime…

The concept of Polyamory as a whole is way too much for me to talk about in one blog post, but there are a couple of musings I guess I want to mention.

Confession .342. You Cut My Brakes And Hit The Throttle…

I don’t know if this is real life, real life
What happens if I open my eyes, my eyes?
Will I ever get my head right, head right?
I don’t know if this is real life, real life…

This song is stuck in my head, like, every other day. But then again, for the last five months it’s been pretty relevant. Lol.

Confession .341. I’m So Powerful, I Don’t Need Batteries To Play…

I put my armor on, show you how strong how I am
I put my armor on, I’ll show you that I am…

Where has old Sia gone? The Sia that wrote empowering shit like this? No, I’m not going to spend this blog post talking about the dumpster fire that is the movie ‘Music’… but know I’m not happy with it. I’m just saving that for when I feel more ranty.

Confession .340. Maybe I’m Not Pretty, Maybe I’m Just Fun…

I’m not gunna ask for help
Cause all you’re gunna say is
“You’re perfect, and, oh, you’re so worth it”
But sometimes I hate myself
I get inside my head and
I think that I somehow deserve this…

I’m back. And if this is your first time here and you don’t know where I went, I had weight loss surgery, something I talked a lot in a post HERE.

Confession .173. Hold Me Tight, Or Don’t…

I got too high again when I realized I can’t not be with You
Or be just Your friend
I love you to death, but I just can’t, I just can’t pretend
We were lovers first, confidants, but never friends
Were we ever friends?

I’m back!  Sorry it took me, like, a whole week to get my shit together after my mini-vacation in New Orleans.  It was just such an amazing time, and I came back ready to hit the ground running on some other stuff, I kinda tripped and forgot the whole “take pictures” aspect of my life.  Lol.  Never again!

Well, that’s a lie… I’ll probably flake again at some point.  But never purposely, and never because I don’t love youuuu!

Confession .79. There IS Such A Thing As White Privilege…

Red and yellow, black and white
They are precious in the Father’s eyes…

It’s been awhile since I’ve put a ‘mostly square’ picture in here… so my apologies if that close up is huge.  All the more to look at the pretty nails, though, my dear.  😀  Astralia is doing what I really feel like more people should be doing… and that is that she’s made actual mesh nails (in both Almond and Stiletto styles… I’m wearing Stiletto right now) to fit atop the Slink and Vista mesh hands… and then will work on add-ons, like these cute diamonds I’m also wearing, for these nails… rather than confining herself to the nails on the hands.  There is also a creator kit, I believe, for those who want to make polishes for her nails.  So ultimately, she’s a damn genius.

Sorry… had to gush a bit before I got into today’s post…

Confession .06. My Faith Is Both Easy And Hard To Lose

Boy, look at You looking at me
I know You know how I feel…
Loving you is hard, being here is harder
You take the wheel.
I don’t wanna do this anymore, it’s so surreal…
I can’t survive if this is all that’s real…

“We won’t survive.  We’re sinking into the sand.”

I am very… strange.  Let’s be honest, we all knew that… lol.  But what I mean is, I’m very strange when it comes to my experiences with other people, and the human race in general.  In some instances, it is very easy for me to lose my faith in someone/people as a whole, and in other instances, it is very difficult for you to fall out of favor with me.

Confession .05. I Drive My Grandmother’s Car

I drive your truck
I roll every window down
And I burn up every back road in this town
I find a field, tear it up
Til all the pain’s a cloud of dust
Yeah, sometimes I drive your truck…

“Mama asked me this morning if I’d been by your grave.  But that flag and stone ain’t where I feel you, anyway…”

Something about being in this peaceful sim in a pretty new dress with some hair reminiscent of the ‘old Tivi’ just made me smile and get a bit nostalgic today.  I am blessed to have the sponsors that I have, and while I don’t do this often, I’d like to personally thank Mami Jewell of -AZUL- and Casandra Rain of enVOGUE for unknowingly giving me the excuse to have a rather bittersweet, tender kind of past few hours while editing these pictures and reflecting while I listen to this song and write.  It was sad, but it was a heart-warming kind of sad… if that makes sense.