Posted in Enchantment, Events, FaMeshed, Life, New Releases, ROMP

Confession .207. Turns Out I’m Your Favorite Thing To Discuss…

Nothing that you say is mildly true
Spit deceit through shift smiles
Two faces you’ve had for awhile
You act like such a fucking child…

Confession .207.  Turns Out I'm Your Favorite Thing To Discuss...

Today, I’d like to have a fun little chat about gaslighting – so please consider this your trigger warning for subjects like self-harm, psychological/mental abuse, and other similar themes.  If you click off for this reason, then see you next time!  ♥

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Posted in Events, FaMeshed, Life, New Releases, ROMP

Confession .188. Hold Up, Girl, Don’t You Know You’re Beautiful?

So won’t You ride with me, ride with me
See where this thing goes…
If it’s meant to be, it’ll be, it’ll be
Baby, if it’s meant to be…

Confession .188.  Hold Up, Girl, Don't You Know You're Beautiful?

It’s been… several days.  And the reasoning for which I wish wasn’t the reason.  Was that vague enough?

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Posted in 4Mesh, Collabor88, Events, Life, New Releases, ROMP, We <3 RP

Confession .154. Cause I’m A Fucking Mess Sometimes…

Cause I had the best of the worst sides
And I had these lungs
And I had too many flash fires that I just let them burn
Til my chest is on fire
And my head just won’t die
I guess I’m lyin’ cause I wanna
I guess I’m lyin’ cause I don’t
Cause I just feel so tired…

Confession .154.  Cause I'm A Fucking Mess Sometimes...

“Like it’s move or slowly die…”

Again, sorry not sorry that Eden songs have been stuck in my head for the last several days.  It’s one of those times when I re-discover how much I love something.  Especially when I spent more hours than I’d like to count tabbed into the Hunt avatar managing everything over there, I just toss on a mix that’s an hour or two long so I don’t have to worry about finding new songs to listen to.  And one of my favorite mixes is full of Eden and The Eden Project songs.  Lol.

So can you really blame me?

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Posted in 4Mesh, Collabor88, Events, Fantasy Gacha Carnival, Powder Pack for Lelutka (November), ROMP

Confession .153. And It Mean Nothing Til You Let It…

And You say I drink and I smoke and I talk too much
But I know You lied when You said that You just had enough and save Yourself
So hear me out…

Confession .153.  And It Means Nothing Til You Let It...

“And You said need me to let this go, but it’s who I am.  Or am I just losing it?  Cause You said ‘Jump’ and I went first, but falling’s always been my downfall.”

This song.  Ugh.  It just punches me right in the feels.  So… I’m sorry if it punches you in the feels too.  *Nods lots*  Then again, most things that Eden and The Eden Project does know exactly how to drag you through a rollercoaster of emotions that you didn’t know you were going to feel for those 3 to 5 minutes.

It’s fucking tragically beautiful.

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Posted in Collabor88, Events, FaMeshed, Life, New Releases, Rewind, ROMP

Confession .118. What’s Left Of My Heart’s Still Made of Gold…

And I know that I’m still fucked up
But aren’t we all, my love?
Darling, our scars make us who we are
So when the winds are howling strong
And you think you can’t go one
Hold tight, sweetheart…

Confession .118.  What's Left Of My Heart's Still Made Of Gold...

I’ve talked about this a few times before, once extensively that I can remember… unless I’m just implanting memories in my own head, which is entirely possible as I’ve not had much sleep today… but it’s time to go over it again.

Progressive Myoclonous Epilepsy with Early Dementia.  Or, FENIB.  (Which means something else entirely that I don’t know.)

My family’s disease.

Continue reading “Confession .118. What’s Left Of My Heart’s Still Made of Gold…”

Posted in Events, Hentai Fair, Kawaii Project, ROMP, Shiny Shabby, The Epiphany

Confession .66. Opia

Shoutout to my ex, You’re really quite the man
You made my heart break at that made me who I am
Here’s to my ex, hey, look at me now
I’m all the way up, I swear You’ll never bring me down!

Confession .66.  Opia

opia
n. the ambiguous intensity of looking someone in the eye, which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable—their pupils glittering, bottomless and opaque—as if you were peering through a hole in the door of a house, able to tell that there’s someone standing there, but unable to tell if you’re looking in or looking out.

I’ve always been one to kink for sensory deprivation.  I always loved the idea of it within SL, and then when I went into the RL community, I experimented with it and found just as intense a love for it there as well.  Though I think my enjoyment of it in RL came in a completely different form than I would have liked for it to.

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