Is A/anybody out there?
Can Y/you take this weight of mine?
Is A/anybody out there?
Can Y/you lead me to the light?
i don’t like talking much about my dad. i’ve told the story in here of how he died/how i found out about it… and i’ve told a few stories about him generally – especially when it comes to ways i’m like he was… but otherwise, i don’t really like to talk about him. Tbh, it’s still really hard… 5 years later, things like his birthday still make it feel like it was yesterday.
It’s very odd when SL mirrors RL in a closer way than you expect. i was looking for an urn to use for this photo… and the one that i ultimately ended up choosing for the scene is actually eerily similar to what my dad’s urn *actually* looks like. Which just made editing this that much harder.
Which might explain why it’s 9:30 at night, my time, and i’ve been trying to get this done all day and have been avoiding it.
(Hell, even now, writing this, i stopped and avoided it for like an hour.)
November 4th is still kinda an odd day each year. i have 2 modes within which i function: staying in bed, hiding, and being dead to the world… or needing to be around people because i don’t trust myself alone. There is no in between. And that’s the thing about being mostly introverted while also being cognitively dysfunctional. Sometimes i don’t want to be around people, but i need them.
i need them to ensure i, quite literally, keep breathing.
And that might be a morbid thought but when have i ever been less than brutally honest here? i’m sorry to be a damper on Y/your evening. This is just where my head is at, i guess.
So just… give me a minute to fall back into the swing of everything after getting back… i’m not fully myself right now.
Shape || Mine
* Head || Blueberry Head (v3.2) | Catwa
Body || Lara Body (v4.1) | Maitreya
Skin || Miranda Skin (Mixedtype Tone) | Deetalez
Hair || Stellar (Red Pack) | Lamb | FaMESHed | new!
* Top || Aria Button-Up Top | Blueberry | new!
* Jeans || Aria Stylized Pants | Blueberry | new!
Heels || Rita Sandals (Blush) | fri.day
Chair&Pose || Annona Chair (Rug) | Junk
Urn || Ali Baba Urn | PWYW
Location || Elysion
Blogging Tune || “Carry You” – Ruelle ft. Fleurie
Antisocial Darwinism 